Dual Identities
You exist not as a body or as a mind or as somebody. You exist as you. You carry identities of yourself with which you connect. In Sanskrit they are called upaadhis. Upaadhi has two meanings: one is the identification and the second is disease.
In Sanskrit, the word has two meanings: identification and disease. The very language is designed for enlightenment. The very language is designed to express enlightenment. You cannot translate many of the words. I can only express the concepts.
See the idea, any identity is disease! With this one word upaadhi, they tell you very clearly any identity you have is a disease. By giving the same word for both the meanings, they say try to get rid of it.
You have two identities. One is the identity which you show to the outer world as you. It will always be more than what you are. Your visiting card will be always more than what you are. You will be constantly going around, 'Do you know who I am? Do you know who I am? Do you know who I am?' This is ahankaar. It will be always more than what you are.
Second identity is what you believe as you inside your mind. That is mamakaar. It will always be lower than what you are; it is inferiority complex. That is why constantly you are torturing yourself; you are trying to develop yourself.
The identity which you show to the outer world is always more than what you are. The identity which you show to the inner world, what you believe as you, is always less than what you are. You are constantly trying to chisel and develop your identity. The fight between these two identities is life.
Your whole life is nothing but the fight between these two identities. The fight between the identity which you believe as you in the inner world and the identity which you project to the outer world, is what your life is.
If you remember the whole thing is one more dream, suddenly the whole conflict disappears. The identity which you show to the outer world is also a dream, illusion. The identity which you believe as you in the inner world is also a dream, illusion. Suddenly you are out of the dream. You wake up, you are out!
The fight is not there anymore. Constantly you trying to chisel yourself, torturing yourself, that is the main reason for all the sufferings and struggles and stress and conflicts you carry inside you. See the difference between what you show as you in the outer world, what you carry as you in the inner world!
The moment you close your eyes and sit in a room alone, the tears are just waiting, suffering is just waiting inside to come up. But when you come out, you wipe everything with a tissue paper, put a little makeup, put on a smiling face.
Sometimes in the developed civilization it becomes too much. The other day one of our devotees who is an elderly person, was telling me, 'Swamiji, in this country we have to use all the makeup and look young because we have to compete with the youngsters.' I can say that is the worst thing.
Fortunately that is not the case in the villages of Bharat. The cities of Bharat of course are no more the true Bharat. They may be geographically Bharat, but they don't carry the spirit of Bharat. In the Hindu villages, the more you are aged, the more you are respected. They don't have to compete with youngsters. But unfortunately in some civilizations, they have to constantly show an identity which is not themselves. They have to create that strong identity which is not them.
Remember, this whole thing is one more dream. Suddenly you will see you will have the tremendous relaxation inside you. The fight between these two identities stops. The war comes to an end instantly. Stop the war which is happening inside. That is the first thing you need to do for global peace.
Everybody is shouting about stopping the wars outside. But a big war is going on inside each of us. Look inside. We are afraid to look inside. That is why we look outside. We don't sit with ourselves. Even if you get the time to sit with yourself, you sit with the television. Just yesterday I saw an article which says a middle class man in the USA sits an average of five and half hours in front of the television. I was shocked, five and half hours! More than 20% of his day!
It is because you can't sit with yourself! I am not saying, don't watch television. All I am saying is, do not sit with television because you can't sit with yourself. Learn that art of just sitting with yourself. Learn how to sit with yourself. You can't sit with yourself because the moment you sit with yourself, so much comes out from inside. So you want some entertainment, you want to sit with somebody.
If you remember the whole thing is a dream, what goes on inside you and outside you is a dream, this clarity will suddenly bring tremendous inner healing. The fight between you and you will stop. The fight between ahankaar and mamakaar, the identity which you show to the outer world and inner world, will stop. You will suddenly relax and rest. A new energy will be awakened inside you. The whole thing will relax, settle into your being, it will melt down and rest in your consciousness. This is what I call yukti, clarity.