Questions and Answers on Tapas
Beloved Swamiji, I am not able to maintain a constant state of motivation. Even though I have had many glimpses, sometimes the mind and body just give up, and I feel that it is not worth the effort.
Understand, Tapas means sacrificing everything else without compromising. Whenever a cognitive shift happens in your life. When your internal understanding is trying to set a new routine for your body and mind, naturally they will protest, because they don't want their old way of life to be disturbed.
Whenever a cognitive shift happens, you will suddenly see that your regular routine is a little disturbed. It becomes a little chaotic. Your body and mind will be struggling to cope up with this change.
If you try to live your life based on this new understanding, many things are going to be thrown slightly out of gear – it may be your job, your relationships, your routine. At such times, have the courage to go through the disturbance, to go through the chaos and settle into the new understanding, establishing yourself strongly, permanently in the new understanding, is what I call tapas.
Swamiji, even internalizing a new understanding demands a lot from me! Somehow, a lot of fear comes up whenever I feel that I might have to make many changes in my life to accommodate a new truth.
Have courage. For a few months, even if you feel your life is completely shaken, okay, nothing wrong! Call sick if you want to. Better call sick, otherwise you will be sick! And let that understanding churn you.
The non-mechanical parts of your brain will be awakened. That is what I mean when I say that even in your dreams, you will remember very clearly the great ideas and teachings which you heard, which have become part of you.
If you have heard or remembered my teachings at least a few times in your dreams, it means the non-mechanical parts of your brain has already awakened. The awakening has started. I tell you, surely you will see a beautiful new order arising out of that awakening.
Tapas: glimpses from my life