Chapter 16
The Pain Shaft
A very beautiful analogy by Ramana Maharishi: the dog will try to keep on biting the dry bone. As it keeps on biting, the bone will poke into its mouth. From its own mouth, the blood will come out, but the dog will think that the blood is coming from the bone and drink that blood, enjoy that blood.
Exactly the same thing happens in you when you swallow violence, when you eat violence, when you are digesting violence. Save yourself from violence. Understand, it is not just the physical violence, even the psychological violence is constantly getting added into the society, into our system, from too many sources. If violence excites you, you will be waiting for those kinds of incidents in your life.
If pain excites you, if you believe life is a pain shaft, you will be waiting for that kind of incident in your life and it will strengthen your belief.
Understand, this is an important truth. The depression or low mood which you experienced 10 years ago, the depression or low mood which you experienced 9 years ago, the depression which you experienced 8 years ago, the depression which you experienced 1 year ago, are all independent experiences that happened in your life.
Ten years ago, you would have been in depression because you don't have a son. Four years ago, you may have been in depression because you have a son! They are independent incidents causing independent experiences. But in the inner space, for the sake of convenience, you archive all the sufferings in one file for easy remembrance and easy reference. When you archive them all in one file, by and by, you connect all these depressions and experiences and come to an idea, 'My life in the last ten years was depression.' No! All ten different depression experiences happened in different ways, for different reasons, at different times. But when you connect all of them and see, you come to an idea, 'For the last nine years, I have been in depression.'
The moment you come to an idea, 'I was in depression for the last nine years', now you create an enemy who does not exist. Now you start fighting with him, 'I have to come out of depression. What to do?' The moment you create the shaft that for the last nine years, you were in depression, now you know for sure, that for the next nine years you are going to be in depression.
You will say, 'Yes, for the last nine years I was in depression, then naturally, tomorrow morning I am going to be in depression. How can I suddenly come out? How is it going to happen? I am going to be in depression.' This is a passive agreement with your enemy.
Understand, first thing, you create an enemy who does not exist.
Second thing, you already made a passive agreement with your enemy.
Then how do you think you will not attract depression? You created the enemy who does not exist and already created passive agreement with him. Then, naturally, you will say, 'No, no, Swamiji, I am in depression, please do something.' My presence cannot help, only your presence can help you. Nothing else can be done.
Chronic Ailments – A Direct Outcome of the Pain Shaft
People come and tell me, 'Swamiji, for the last twenty years I have knee pain.' No, it cannot be! Please, understand, it cannot be. I am not disrespecting you or adding more suffering to you by saying all the problems are in your head. No, I am not disrespecting you, I am just telling the truth: all the problems are in your head! I am just stating the truth.
The knee pain which you experienced two years ago, the knee pain which you experienced one year ago, the knee pain which you experienced two months ago, the knee pain which you experienced two hours ago are independent experiences. When you connect them and see, you stop the possibility of self-healing.
Whether you believe it or not, medical science proves that your body constantly updates itself and replaces itself once in every 365 days. Your brain cells, the cells in your intestines are all replaced within a particular number of days. If you are carrying a particular disease for quite a long time, it means you have a strong belief that it is a continuous experience, it is a continuous shaft.
For example, once in 47 days, your intestine gets replaced completely. Understand, I am not saying that Ayurveda is telling so. If I say Ayurveda says so, you won't believe. Medical Your unconscious belief that something is a continuous experience forces your mind to bring the same pain and disease back. science says so. The logical allopathic medical science is saying, once in 47 days your intestines are completely replaced. If you are carrying any disease related to the intestine for more than 47 days, even the new system which you create is carrying the same disease because you create it with the mental set-up, 'I have this problem, so I have to continue to have this problem. My new system should also have this problem.'
You might have heard about this story of a woodcutter:
There was once a woodcutter who was cutting a tree near the river when his axe fell into the river.
A goddess appeared and she brought a golden axe and asked, 'Is it yours?'
He said, 'No'.
Then she brought a silver axe and asked, 'Is it yours?' He again said, 'No'.
Then she brought his axe, made of iron and asked, 'Is it yours?'
He said, 'Yes, yes, it is mine.'
The goddess was very pleased with his honesty and handed over all the three axes to him.
Now, I will tell you the extension of the story, the second edition!
The same hunter was cutting the tree by the same river. He was being assisted by his wife. Suddenly, by mistake, his wife fell into the river.
The goddess appeared, brought a beautiful woman, and asked the hunter if she was his wife.
The woodcutter replied, 'Yes, yes, yes!'
The goddess got very angry and said, 'How dare you greedy fellow! Last time, when the axe fell into the river, you told the truth, but now when your wife fell, you are telling a lie.'
The woodcutter replied, 'No, no, you don't understand my problem. Last time you asked first whether the golden axe was mine, then whether the silver axe was mine, and then you showed me my axe. When I said the last axe was mine, you gave me all three. Now again, if you give three women to me what will I do! I know what suffering I am going through with one! That is the reason I took precautionary steps. Anything is ok, but please just leave me with one wife, not more!'
Anyhow, just like how that goddess was asking the woodcutter whether something better was his, in the same way, every time Parashakti is asking, 'Is this your new body?' She is creating a new body. The nature, the self-healing energy which resides in you is Parashakti, your Mother part.
Understand, the energy which is inside your body and rejuvenates you is the part contributed to you by your mother. It is from your Mother, Parashakti. Your physical mother is the representation of your Cosmic Mother. When the Cosmic Mother comes and says, 'Is this new intestine yours?', you say, 'No, no, no, bring my old one!'
Our mental setup is such that we strongly believe that depression or disease is a shaft happening inside us. It is not. The depression you experienced ten years ago, the depression you experienced nine years ago, the depression you experienced eight years ago are independent, unconnected incidents, experiences. When you connect all of them and see, you create the pain shaft, the depression shaft, 'Oh, my life is depression!' Now you are ready to get defeated by the unknown enemy.
Understand, for the sake of convenience and easy reference, you put all the depression incidents in one file; by and by you started believing all of them are existentially connected. No, they are not existentially connected.
One important thing, this is a very basic truth: neither can you break the shaft, nor can you elongate the shaft, because the shaft does not exist. All you can do is just be aware that it does not exist; you created it in your mind.
One more thing, the moment you believe all your depression is connected, you are a depressed being. The joyful incidents that happened in between the painful ones will be forgotten; you will not even remember them. Understand, you will not even remember them.
That is what I mean when I say that you don't have a clear picture about your past.
If you have a clear picture about your past, it will become a solid experience. It will not be a load; it will become strength. Undigested past is a load, digested past is strength. We don't digest our past. It just stays on us like a load, like a headache. When you connect all the painful incidents and create a pain shaft, you create an enemy who does not exist and you start fighting with him.
Please understand, I am repeating some of the words again and again because, suddenly, you might change the channel! If it is a little boring, please bear with me! I am repeating, so that it can enter into your system.
Somebody asks Buddha, 'Why are you repeating the same thing for forty years? He says, 'If you had heard the first time, why do you think I would repeat a second time!'